Monday, March 09, 2009

The GNP of my uterus is definitely lagging behind the NASDAQ

J and I are pretty lucky in that we still both have jobs we love. We own our home, are not under water debt-wise and are very, very careful with money. Having said that, we are by no means the Hiltons (the old ones who had a ton of money not their lame-ass entitled grandchildren) nor can we spend spend spend like we (me) would like to.

And one thing about this economy, you really have to make choices about what you spend money on.

And that, my friends, brings us to my uterus.

Who would've thought that one nice side effect of our downward slide as a country would be a renewed kick in the metaphorical ass about my (lack of) fertility? It comes to this: we can either renovate our house, or have a kid. We can either order out as much as I want, or have a kid. We can buy a nice, reliable used car to take the place of my stalled out, battery-dead, ugly, basically-up-on-4-blocks Pontiac, or we can have a kid.

Now, there is no contest there, to us. I would sleep outside and drive a Dodge Dart (remember that Mom and Dad and B?) and eat mac and cheese straight out of the box every night (who am I kidding, that last part would actually be AWESOME) to have another kid. It just sucks that we have to consider costs at all in that area.

Other people (see: that fucking octomom) can have as many kids as they want for free! Free! It's like free ice cream cone day at Ben and Jerry's, only its a kid! But for us, it is the same investment many other parents spend on, say, a community college tuition.

This is not about adopting. I have no issues with that. This is about cost. Hard cash. I have spent time over the last few days being really, really pissed at my MTHFR or uterus or eggs or whatever the hangup is in there. Because for us, it can never be a "Oh i got drunk one night and boom!" or "my period was late and who knew, right????" that ends with a $20 co-pay for the hospital charge for my entire birthing process. And I get to come home with a kid! A free kid!

Oh, no.

It has to be a process. Long, drawn out, hard and expensive.

However, unlike eating out every night or getting that Mercedes I want, what we will spend our money on will pay us back in spades. I know that. The ROI on kids is immeasurable. I just wish I didn't have to think about this ugly side.